3/11/09
i do not have a good feeling about this.
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 11:06 PM
14/10/09
FALSE ALARM.
like always.
HAHA.
what a joke.
between couples, break break break.
between MARRIED couples, divorce divorce divorce.
WHATEVER.
got a replacement for evening's q-length.
cos i felt shitty just now.
like cough cough, and stupidly got runny nose
now i'm stuck.
TO CLUB OR NOT?
oh man.
but i alrd agreed to!
=((
but..
i can hear my head throb =((
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 5:05 PM
10/10/09
word = DIVORCE
action = i dunno what
circumstance = confused children
outcome = disastrous/same old
heard it many times throughout my 19years.
always came from dad
never gave it much thought.
mum talked to me ydae.
i thought it would be alright
everything was settled
i even wasn't so angry about the msg i read
cos i somehow just wanna believe that it really is a guy
woke up this morn
dad came home from the market
without mum
and mentioned the word.
okay,
so now what?
mum refuses to come home
breathing some fresh air i guess
says she has made up her mind.
issit just rashness on her part or what?
something said in a moment of anger?
test of time?
i really am starting to lose faith
like,
i have this feelings that relationships never work out
and relationships don't last.
can we just have children without marriage?
since relationships do not last,
den why bother marriage right?
argh fuck.
i can't wait to get out of the house.
forever like that.
said this before
saying it again
because it's always happening.
been busy for the whole week.
v tired.
can't even have peace at home.
and i still get questioned
"this house v bad uh? why you always like to go out?"
you guys should know better ain't it?
not a time that there's no quarrels uh?
i dunno how long this on-off war is going to last between you 2.
children's votes do not count during a decision of divorce.
we're not the ones to make the decision.
it's not right.
it's between the both of you.
goodluck to us.
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 1:35 PM
29/09/09
Know which part i liked the most?
When i played "Hush hush" and said "This song's for you."
But you said "Wo ye you."
And played "Be with you."
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 7:06 PM
Let go of the past.
Face the present with a smile.
And look forward to the future.
Gonna learn to trust again.
People should always be given second chances?
Although at some point of time,
the facts would just come chasing,
haunting me.
But you could give me a chance.
Why can't I?
Whoever came up with the phrase "Revenge is Sweet?"
I think of plotting a revenge,
and i imagine how horrible the outcome would be.
Hurt .
Who hasn't been hurt before?
But instead of pushing ALL the blame to others,
take a moment to ponder.
Maybe some fault lies with you.
I decided that this was my fault.
My fault my fault.
All my fault.
Anyway,
i guess it takes a long time to understand someone.
And it isn't easy trying to some to terms with the person's habit, behaviour, actions, words and whatever that's connected to them.
Especially when the person means something to you.
You can get irritated just by a lil action of his/hers
Or get affected by just a lil something he says.
When someone does something,
it usually accompanies a good intention.
Especially when that someone loves you.
However,
with different mindsets,
the interpretation might be wrong,
leading to arguments and disputes between the 2.
In such instances,
both must speak their minds,
allow the other to uds what's going on.
Preventing misunderstandings,
preventing unnecessary quarrels.
Whatever the case,
anyone needs a mediator,
FELICIA QUEK's here.
HAHAs.
whatever luh.
I need a mediator myself at times.
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 4:29 PM
23/09/09
i dont know why you're doing this to me.
i don't know why you gotta bluff me like this.
is it me?
or what?
why you wanna torture me like this?
why?
if you're not interested,
just let me go.
why do you want to keep me tied to you,
when you're not interested at all?
why do you want to keep me there,
just so that you can make me suffer?
why tell me all lies?
i really am trying hard to understand.
but i just cant.
nobody i talk to will be able to give me advices
because none of them are like you.
everyone's saying just forget it
but you're not allowing me.
WHY?
why don't you wanna let me just let it go,
when you don't really want me at all?
do you know how it feels like being me?
everywhere i go,
i think of you.
even ydae,
we went to dhoby.
the first thing i thought of,
was to walk over to that shop,
and see if there are any suitable materials for the scrapbook
i was supposed to help you with.
and den i scolded myself
and i got scolded by someone else as well.
it hurts so bad.
because the someone who scolded me doesn't really know me well
but still,
his concern was so genuine that i was almost touched to tears.
even though he was sorta shouting at me,
but it wasn't hatred that i felt,
but actually some warmth.
thanks to you,
i realise that there are so many ppl who are actually there for me.
JAVEY!
i really appreciate all the company you've given me.
really.
i dunno how to describe.
just..
THANK YOU.
LOVEs.
once i think about the moment i heard your voice on the phone,
seriously..
just tell me the truth.
i wanna hear the truth!
i wanna noe the truth!
why can't you just tell me?
why?
i can't sleep at night
even though i'm so tired.
not sleeping well every night.
trying to escape everyday,
till my father's gonna ban me from going out.
but i really feel very xinku at home.
REALLY.
FUCK.
i know it's so stupid,
because humans are so stupid.
and i'm a typical stupid human,
who thinks that by torturing yourself,
you wouldn't feel that hurt.
drinking, smoking, everything that's gonna harm my body,
i wanna try.
I WANNA TRY.
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 1:15 PM
15/09/09
LOOOONG time since i typed here.
i dunno why
always plan to do this
but i always fail
hais.
actually i know luh
because the opposite party is you.
you're a cheater.
i hate it.
i really made up my mind to just let go
but you just wouldn't let me.
always making me have that kinda feeling
always dangling in mid air
having that short thrill
like when on a roller coaster ride.
why can't your attitude be consistent?
why must it fluctuate according to situations?
why must i feel weird when you reply SOOO slowly?
can i not be so sensitive towards all this?
but i'm afraid the day that i really do not feel this way,
would be the day that the feelings really have flown away.
but they're not flying away.
no they're not.
and it seems like they're here to stay.
how about yours?
`feLicia took an umbrella @ 10:49 PM
